Christmas

I am getting a little excited. It will be the first time ever we will be having a Christmas day, it does even involve teens at my house and I am so very much looking forward to it. I have been assigned a job of chopping vegetables in the kitchen and generally helping out, does that mean I can wear something sexy and keep trying to entice him whilst he is cooking the Christmas dinner.....????

Merry Christmas my Love, I do love you so very very much and I truly hope you like your presents this year!!!!

Your Angel

xxx

Feelings

I have not written here for a long time but in the meantime so much has happened. I am very hopeful for the future but there are 2 things that are really worrying me. I want him to spend nights with me on a regular basis, as we can not share a house together for another while I am ok with that, although I dont like living on my own, I love being in a proper relationship with someone but we have to take it slow and I understand that. What I dont understand is why he will not spend any nights with me when there are occasions now that he can. How can he claim to love me as much as he does yet prefer to sleep alone when he has opportunities to be with me?

I still yearn so much to be included in his life and he will know what I mean by that, I dont want to give too many details away here but it does really hurt when I am still after so long being separated from the 2 people he loves the most. I know he says he has his reasons and I understand them a little but my heart is screaming to be taken out of the secret closet. I am trying to be patient and give him time but its getting harder and harder and I really dont want to give up on us. I love him more than I have ever loved anyone, I just wish he would accept me into his life. To me this is not how a relationship is supposed to be. I have made calculated decisions on opening my life to him completely and it hurts that he will not do the same.....maybe I should have called the title patience but maybe I am just running out of that.

Hopefully a more sunny post next time but this was weighing heavy on my chest and I needed to get it off.........

Have a wonderful weekend everone.

Love

His Angel
xxx

My turn to...

Its my turn at the moment to look after my Sweet Love. He came over last night and I had made us some dinner. He is not looking after himself properly because he has so much on his plate. He was looking so shattered, his eyes all red and puffy. He also smoked in the day, I could tell and that alone tells me how stressed he is. I am frustrated because there is so little that I can do for him. So all I do is make sure he eats when he comes around here and create a warm welcome where he can just relax and have some peace with lots of cuddles and love and no demands.....

Its does put to me that there has to be a symbiosis, he often looks after me and does such a great job. Now its my turn. He needs my support, how ever small. I like that I can look after him a little bit. I am on my way now to get some ingredients for dinner again tonight and I find myself looking for things he will love eating.

I love you Hunny, so very much and it will get easier I promise you!!!

Your Angel
xxx

Doctor Fetish

Thinking about this subject. I dont have just any doctor fetish, my doctor fetish includes him, my Lover, my other half. As you have all read I have not been terribly well this week and he has been keeping an eye on me. Making sure I take all of the medication, nagging me about drinking and eating on time but for me one of those magical moments happened when I was sitting on his lap in my conservatory.

I was having a cuddle with him and he was quietly talking to me. He pinched the skin on my arm and my hand and declared I had not been drinking enough, its moments like that when I melt and I realise what a lucky girl I am to have him in my life. I have fantasies about him checking me over completely, I love his caring nature and the way his voice changes when he tells me to do something. He makes me do things I would normally say no to. He has the ability to make me quiver in the most delicious way. He says he has not even started yet, I cant wait. So many fantasies to tell him about and ask him about. I have seen the GP 3x times now over the last 2 weeks and its for certain, its only him that makes my heart beat faster.......every time.

I love you my Sweet.

Your Angel
xxx

Missing him

Its so lovely to hear his voice on the phone. He had a good day and that makes me really happy. We are missing each other but it wont be long. Come home soon my Love, in the meantime I am being a very good girl.....

Love

His Angel
xxx

One night

I know he is only gone for 2 days and one night but I am missing him. I have not been terribly well this week and I need extra cuddles. The thing is he needs downtime too. He does not often get times where he is together with the lads and do boy things. Stuff that us women roll our eyes at lol.....

As for tomorrow, I am hoping he will stay over, I am soooo hoping he will stay over. The invitation is there and I know its possible too. Will he or wont he....? All I want is for him to be here and say "Baby its bedtime, go and get ready", then snuggle together and sleep next to him. I love him so incrediby much. I know he is still holding out, still waiting for that right moment to come out and say to the world how important I am to him. I truly hope it wont be too long because its so hard to be hidden like this. I still dont think he understands how much I struggle with that.

He has made some massive changes and even he commented on how much better it makes things for our relationship. I love seeing his car from my kitchen window. I love hiding the key for him so he can let himself in to come and cuddle me in bed. When I was not feeling well, he cooked, cleaned up and then ran me a bath, undressed me, read a magazine to me, wrapped me in a towel and put me to bed, tucked me in and lovingly kissed me. Once he realised I did not want him to go he became more stern with me. Daddy is telling you, you need sleep more than anything. Be Daddy's good little girl please......

Night night Daddy, I hope you sleep well and please come stay round here tomorrow evening.

I love you

His Angel
xxx

Making Love

We had been making love for hours, I am such a lucky girl with an incredible giving lover and we had more or less worn each other out. We were so hungry for each other, the kisses were loving and claiming, I lost count of the amount of times he said "Mine...". I adore it when he says that, so much!!!

So we decided to snuggle, I was laying on his left hand side, curled up on his chest, warm and cozy and we both dozed off and it was gorgeous. We spend so few nights together that just laying there and basking in his glow to me is still so special. We must have slept for nearly an hour and we both stirred, now giving the amount of times he had made love to me and fucked me too....I thought I had completely depleted him but he never fails to surprise me.....in one swift movement and a cuddle, our lips found each other again and I could feel him being hard underneath my leg. He pulled me onto him and entered me again at the same time. It felt so incredibly good.....like I said I really am the luckiest girl. We made out again, a mixture of making love passionately and holding my hips and fucking me whilst looking deep into my eyes. He is making me his again, His Angel.........I dont think I ever went away. He knows that now too.

After we had come downstairs and made something to eat together he completely blew me away again with a new name I may be allowed to call him sometimes but thats entirely for another post, another day.....

Love

His Angel
xxx

Guilt

My eyes are so sore and puffy this morning, I know its a result from crying for hours last night. We were together and had some very difficult conversations. He needs to get things of his chest and I need to hear them too but the guilt that comes with that is so overwhelming.

We are still so wrapped up in the past month, its so hard sometimes to let go because it scared us so incredibly much and the thing we both very much agree on is to never let it get to that point again. Communication, how ever hard, is the key. Our relationship is deepening again but I crave to get that intimacy back. I love him so deeply, like I have never loved any man before. It scares me and fills my heart with such joy at the same time.

I was trying to explain something to him last night but the phone rang right at that crucial moment. I wanted to explain how I got to that point, that I did not think I deserved to be loved, that I did not feel very loved anymore and that I accepted anything at that point. It was a very low point indeed. Its opened my eyes and even though my heart is heavy today and I can hardly open my eyes from crying so much I do know today that I am loved and that I love him so much in return and thats a beautiful start....

Maybe by writing this here today I can try and get past it somehow, I need to in order to move on, its too damaging to keep feeling what I am feeling and I need to use that energy to show him how much I love him and I want a future with him...

Love

His Angel

xxx

Missing

Does he have any idea how much I crave to have him in my mouth? To devour him with my lips, my tongue, to swirl my tongue around his thickness, to taste him. I adore seeing the look on his face, that intense look in watching his baby worshipping his cock. Thats what I do you see. I have never enjoyed any man like I enjoy him.

For me it gets even better when he wraps his hands around my face and pushes my head really gently. I adore it when he wraps my long hair around his fists and holds me so gently whilst I loose myself in him. My Love please dont make me wait too much longer???

Love

His Angel
xxx

Guardian Angel

Its back to that special word again, "Angel". Does anyone believe in Guardian Angels? I was not sure that I did but from very recent events and talking about it to my Beloved, we have both decided that we both have a very special Guardian Angel. Watching out for us as a couple.

When we look over the events that took place that scared us beyond anything we had ever encountered and we look at the timeline of how events were put into place, we only have one thing to believe.......someone, some very special people were really looking out for us and we thank them!!!!

We have such beautiful things to look forward to, at times we are nearly to scared to believe its really happening but we have both really tried to do things the right way for the people that we love.

So if you like, please stay with me on this exciting journey. As I become his girl more and more again every day, smut will follow again very soon....lol...


Kisses

His Angel
xxx

Smile

Recently there have been some massive changes in my life. Some came with a very steep learning curve but they do say whatever does not kill you makes you stronger. For us as a couple that is certainly true.
I dont want to give out any details but we were so close to loosing each other and thank God we didn't. We learned some harsh truths. We are healing together though and we are crying together and most importantly we are laughing again together.

The difference this time is that my faith in having a future together has been restored, I had lost faith completely, I will have to admit that. So for now we are spending a lot of time together and its so lovely. We are making each other smile so much. I adore making him happy. We still have a way to go but I am eternally grateful that when crunch time came, not only was he there for me, I truly believe he rescued me and I love him for that.

He is becoming more confident again in me being his girl, his baby, his Angel.....


Love

His Angel....
xxx

Request

My mobile rang at just before 8 O'clock this morning. Considering the ringer tone I was curious because we had already spoken on his way into work as we do nearly every morning.

I picked it up a little hesitantly only to be rewarded with his warm voice, "Hello my baby, I just wanted to know if you are dressed yet?" To which I answered " No hunny I am not quite dressed yet I am walking around in my pink dressing gown", he knows exactly which one because he purchased it for me for Christmas, not only is it pink but its soooo soft and its like having a hug every minute that I wear it.

"Well in that case my Love, can you please wear white today" were his words. "You mean white undies today?" I asked him in return, to make sure that was exactly what he wanted. "Yes, I like to think of you wearing virginal white today whilst I am at work" I could hear the smile in his words and skipped upstairs to go and get dressed.....

He is making me fall in love with him over and over again......

Love

His Angel
xxx

Superglue

He led me by my hand and sat me on the armrest of the sofa. His hands folded around my face and he kissed me deeply. Earlier on we had had quite a difficult talk and it was his way of changing the mood for both of us. As we only had some precious time together, this was very important and I was trusting his judgement.

He took both my hands and placed them beside my body to try and make sure that I would not stop him from ravishing me. However every time he kissed my breasts or my nipples my hands would automatically come off the armrest and touch his shoulders or the back of his head. See I love having my hands round the back of his head.... I think it was after two more attempts he decided it was time to change tactics.

He put each of my hands back on the armrest firmly, looked me in the eyes and with a lowered voice said "superglue". For a second I tried to understand what it was that he said. With his voice he superglued my hands to the sofa armrest and began his journey with his mouth and hands discovering all the sweet places he loves to touch.....
I vividly remember a while after that him saying to me: "Baby, you are actually dripping onto my thighs" and he chuckled as he saw the expression on my face.

He can arouse me like no man every could and every time I walk past the sofa it makes me smile....

Love

His Angel
xxx

Certainty

If I know anything with certainty at the moment, its that as a submissive you need to have a partner in your life that does not take advantage of your nature.

A real man claiming to be a Dom takes care of his submissive in so many ways, makes sure she does not get hurt, makes the right decisions, often makes better decisions for her than she would make for herself.

Just my 2 pennies worth for today. I will be back more regularly from now on again....

Love

His Angel
xxx

Hairclip

We had been rolling around on my livingroom floor. You know the kind you do when you are sixteen, except we have figured at our age its so much more fun. We had been kissing for hours and his hands had been roaming my body for ages. My clothes were still on and he had been pulling my jeans up, I was getting so aroused and he knew exactly what he was doing.
My nipples were swollen with anticipation and I could not wait for him to kiss and tease my nipples. To say I was bursting with excitement was an understatement.

Once he had removed the straps of my top and pushed them down, sometimes you just cant be bothered to get undressed, when he wants to have me he does it right as it pleases him in that particular moment. Next I felt my brastrap sliding off my shoulder and the bra pushed down to expose that erect nipple. His mouth closed over my nipple and he sucked it gently to start with, I adore it when he does that and I love how he loves my breasts!!!! I know my head would have gone back to arch my back even more.
Next I could feel him lowering me very gently to the floor, "Get comfy my Love, you will be there for a while" I heard him say with a chuckle.....that low throaty chuckle that I love so much.
As I laid my head on the floor I could feel the little hairclip at the back of my head pressing into my scalp. So I lifted my head off the floor gently and took it out and put it to the side.
He noticed what I had done and his eyes approved, he does not want any other pain for me other than the one I crave.....I had thought nothing of taking my hair clip out. I had probably done this so many times only this time he eyes went to the hair clip on the floor.

He smiled and picked it up. I thought maybe he was going to move it because in our passion he did not want me to roll onto it. As he picked it up in his hands his eyes looked at me....he smiled and I could read his thoughts. He always said to me, " I cant hurt you Baby, I just cannot do it" but he was starting to understand that sometimes I crave pain and he was starting to enjoy experimenting with that pain a little.

Whilst his eyes never left mine, his hand wandered over to my breast and my nipple, he looked at my nipple and the hair clip, dont you just love the way they make you wait, he has that in him so automatically, he then looked at me again to see what my eyes were telling him and he could read I was encouraging him. Unspoken words between us. He opened the hairclip and very gently to start with, surrounded my nipple with the little teeth, he let it close up really slowly and was watching my eyes and loved what he saw. It was one of the first times where he could see how much I loved it and how wet it made me and it was a beautiful moment. He could hear me take in a breath and I moaned at the same time. In that moment I fell in love with him all over again. For me its all about his eyes watching me, he knows me so well now.....am I giving her enough and not too much....

My nipple started to throb in a delicious way and I started to wriggle in my jeans, his hands found their way down and it confirmed for him how much I love what he does to me. His mouth lowered and he kissed me and kissed me.....

Just an innocent little hairclip.....

Love
His Angel
xxx

Wrists

Another thing I relish when he does it to me is holding my wrists together. Even though his hands are of a very normal size he can easily hold both wrists in one hand.
I cannot recount how many times he comes up to me for a cuddle and within seconds I can feel my arms being pulled behind my back and both my wrists clasped in one of his hands.

This leaves his other hand free to roam.....He will kiss me deeply, everytime taking my breath away and I moan into his mouth. His other hand will sometimes very tenderly cradle my face, other times it will find my nipple and pinch it hard.

I think he is starting to enjoy how he can make me gasp....

Love

His Angel
xxx

Today

I have days where the sun is shining and all seems alright with the world and then there are days like today. Its a bit cloudy and dark outside and inside myself it feels the same. Everything feels heavy around me. There are lots of reasons for this. Often I am able to pick myself up quite quickly by giving myself a stern talking to.

The fact that I know he worries about things too, is hard. We are going through a very difficult phase in our lives. We just cant be together yet and neither of us know how much longer it will be. He handles the being without each other a little better I think than I do, simply because he is more used to it from his past worklife. I am learning lots of things about myself. I am learning that I love being in a relationship. I adore doing the mundane things like chores together. The thought of being able to have a cuddle just when you need it in the day is lovely and not having to wait for four days before you know you can see each other again. Even then you know the time you will have together is always too short.
Its amazing how much we do in a morning together, its always beautiful and warm and gorgeous and without problems. Even when we have really tough conversations we still are very loving and very tactile.

So today I have no sexy things for you........For all the couples out there who are having a life together, stand still and enjoy for a moment how precious life really is......

Love

His Angel

Telling her.

Telling my daughter was one of the hardest moments in my life. How do you tell a teenager that Mum and Dad are going to seperate? My daughter has had me at her beck and call all of her life, you see she had some major medical issues since she was only a little toddler and I became her carer as well as being her Mum. It made our bond incredibly strong. It's only in the last year of still staying together it became too difficult.



Ex-hubby and I were trying to stay together until she was 16 and had finished school but life became so incredibly difficult. The things that got me through the day was knowing I would meet my other half in a few days or at the weekend coming. With him I would get the love and understanding I never received within my marriage. Don't get me wrong, my ex husband is not a bad guy at all but he is not the man I want to grow old with, the one I can grow old with....

I always had to be the adult, make the important decisions in life and felt so alone. He did not have my back and I could not go on like that. So eventually we stayed together for another 10 years (madness really looking back on it but you do anything for your kids, dont you?)



As for now I have embarked on a new life. It's so scary but also exciting. So many things to discover, not the least my submissive nature. It has only just now been able to come to the surface because I have finally found someone who really understands me and loves me for who I am.....



Love



His Angel

Questions

Do you ever wonder how on earth you got to this point in your life? You question decisions that you have made, very important ones, what if I had chosen a different path?


The fact is that I am sitting here today, 40 years young, seperated however not yet divorced, with a wonderful man in my life. Except I want the normal 24 hour a day domesticity with him....Or would it be as special?





Love





His Angel

Text message

"Kettle on, knickers off" is the text message that comes through on my phone. Secretely I have been hoping for this kind of text but every time it does surprise me. Does he mean it, or is he joking? I am thinking to myself. We have no specific rules within our relationship, no set DD plan that we are working on. All I know is that I have a deepseated desire to please him, to make him so incredibly happy.



I decide to do as he asks, I run upstairs and take off the cute panties I had put on. I love having cute lingerie on because I am forever trying to seduce him. I hear his car pull up outside my house and I am not quite ready. I start to giggle nervously, relishing every minute of how he is making me feel with just a simple text. I straighten my skirt, my hands smooth the side of the skirt over my hips as I skip down the stairs to let him in.



I open the frontdoor with such a happy smile on my face, only to be greeted by a very handsome face adorned with the biggest grin. As soon as he steps in the door, he pulls me in for a tight cuddle, he kisses me. After we finally let go and I walk over to the kettle to make us a pot of tea he follows up behind me, one hand on my tummy, his other very gently on my naked thigh. His breath in my ear, "Stand still my Angel", I listen instantly, his hand moves up my thigh, around my velvet soft round bum, the next thing I hear is "Just checking, now there is a good girl...." and I melt in that instance.





Love



His Angel

Throat

I had never been a fan of spanking until I met him. He had never been a fan at all. In fact one of our original meetings involved him telling me that he was not dominant at all. This is the same man who now enjoys wrapping his hand lightly around my throat, he knows I trust him implicitely. Quite often I will stretch my neck to give him better access. I relish the feeling of his hands on my throat.



Its such a powerful feeling, the strength of his hands could so easily do an injury but when you combine it with the look of love and lust on his face its so loving and powerful. I guess I will have to back to the spanking another time.....



Love



His Angel

Meeting Him

"Meeting for a coffee cant hurt, can it?" Neither of us had any other intention than having coffee. We had been talking through the net for a few months now. As time progressed, there was a connection. My heart would flutter if I saw him signing in. See, I am not the only mushy one here, apparently when I agreed to that coffee meeting, he ran around his office doing a happy dance, shhhh, of course he will deny saying that lol.....



However the time and the place were set. I remember meeting him so clearly. Him, ever the gentleman, waiting outside the coffee shop for me. Apparently he recognised me straightaway. We hugged briefly and gave each other a polite peck on the cheek. The first thought that shot through my mind was: thank goodness he is not my type. I was so vulnerable you see, having been in a loveless marriage, aged 37, for nearly 7 years. I was like a plant without water, I was starting to wilt from the inside. My sparkle had gone for a long time but the day I met him I came alive again.



Dont get me wrong, the last 3 years have been incredibly hard, sometimes it was maybe easier to walk away but there is something so special between us both that neither of us take the easy way out. Time will tell if we are meant to be living together.......



Love



His Angel

I hear the door being shut really gently downstairs, this means he has found the key and let himself in. Very soft footstep coming up the stairs, I turn over so I can see him coming into the bedroom. He walks over to the bed and kisses my cheek so gently, "Hello my baby" he greets me with.

Next he walks over to the far side of the room and takes his t-shirt off, I admire his back, I adore his back. The jeans are off next, discarded on the floor, he slips into bed with me.......as soon as his body touches mine I can feel his arousal already. I love that I can turn him on like that. We are so hungry for each other. Our kisses start soft and gentle but soon they turn to passionately. His mouth devours mine......my mind starts to wander.....will we make love really slow and gently or will it turn wild. Will he start whispering into my ear, all the filth that I love to hear, will his hands turn over my body, with slight force, knowing very well who is in charge. I adore it when I feel the strength in his arms, moving me to exactly where he wants me.



Or will it be so gentle, his hands cradling my face as he enters me, his voice right there above me, looking deep into my eyes, "I love you my Angel", how I adore it when he calls me that.

Before you know it he will lock my wrists in his hands, I melt when he does this and he knows it....he starts to speed up and I can feel my insides starting to stir...What a beautiful way to be woken on a Sunday morning!

Love

His Angel

Today

Hi,

I dont know why I chose today to start my blog. I have been reading blogs for over 4 years now and they have me hooked. Is my life interesting enough to be starting one of my own? Time will tell I suppose.....

My story started about 10 years ago and a lot has happened. For now the important things are, I am a mother, a lover, a treasured girlfriend and I have a submissive nature. This blog will take you on a journey, it may make you smile, cry, shout with rage but I promise you one thing.....I will always be honest in what I write....

Till next time.....

His Angel
xxx